Eau To Hotness
by star22
Summary: Just Updated! R/R! What happens when Harry, Draco and Ron turn PuNk RoCk and Rita Skeeter gets wind of it? Read and Find out! R/R
1. The Article That Started it All

Eau to Hotness Authors: Emma Thompson and Tiffany Rics  
  
Chapter 1: The Article That Started It All  
  
Hogwarts Gone Hard Core One year ago, Harry Potter was the sweet, innocent, boy who lived. Now he is the PuNk RoCkEr of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He and his friends Draco Malfoy, Ronald Weasley, and his brothers Fred and George Weasley are at the top of the Daily Prophet's most eligible young bachelor's. We need your help to track down the most recent pictures of them. **We Will Pay Money for Copies of Your pictures**  
  
~Author Rita Skeeter; Special Correspondent 


	2. The Strange Dream

Chapter 2: The "Strange" Dream  
  
"Harry, Ron look at this!" bellowed Hermione as she read the Daily Prophet. "What, Now! We already did our homework and you know it!" Ron screamed down from the sixth year's dormitories. The two boys reluctantly came down to the common room. Harry grabbed the Daily Prophet and said, "Oy, what'd Rita get on me this time?" But as Harry's eyes scanned the page, realization of what he was reading downed on him. He just couldn't believe what he was reading! Sure, Harry had gone through "some" changes but people paying for pictures of him. This was a bit too much. Ron snatched the paper out of Harry's hands and scanned it rapidly. He then drooped unconsciously into the armchair behind him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When he awoke, he found Hermione in hysterics over his state. Harry had apparently gone to get ice from the kitchens for Ron's head (according to Hermione that is.) "I had the strangest dream," Ron said. "I dreamt that Harry, Draco, The Twins, and I were wanted for pictures in the Daily Prophet. Weird, huh?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On his way to the kitchens, Harry found something, well, rather, someone, far better than ice. It was Draco Malfoy, and judging by his expression. Had no idea what had happened. "Hey, Potter." (The two never understood why, but they still addressed one another by last only), "What are you doing skulking the corridors without Granger and Weasley?" asked Draco in a rather dramatic voice. "You mean you really don't know?" asked Harry. "Know what?" Harry feeling it better to get out of the corridors said, "You'd better come with me." Harry led him into Gryffindor tower, where Hermione had Ron lying on the floor. Ron was telling Hermione of His "strange" dream. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "You were nagging on me and Harry to do our homework! But, when we were done, you beckoned us down stairs. We then read the paper and Rita Skeeter wanted pictures of me for the Daily Prophet's Most Eligible Young Bachelor's." "Rita's a dumbass to want pictures of you Ron!" Draco broke in. "Your the Dumbass, Draco! She wants pictures of you too!" Ron screamed back. "RON!" Hermione screamed as she punched in the stomach. "It wasn't a dream." 


	3. The Chase is On

Chapter 3: That Chase is on  
  
Harry led Draco to the window of the Gryffindor common room. "Draco, you don't understand! This is a major problem!" Harry exclaimed as they peered over the window sill. "Oh shit!" Draco screamed as he hit the ground. Hermione then came to the window to shut the blinds since Harry; Draco & Ron were flat on their stomachs trying to escape the girls' that had worked their way onto the Hogwarts grounds.  
  
"There they are!!" bellowed a girl about Harry's age. "I'm getting 50 galleons for that shot!!" screamed another. "Not if I send it in first Lauren!" Yelled a fourth year. Then Lauren jumped at the fourth year & knocked her to the ground with a rather loud thud.  
  
"This is getting bloody brutal." Ron said as he peeked through the closed curtains. "This could be bad." Harry said with an over frightened look on his face. Draco then whimpered as Harry and Ron pulled him from the floor. "Don't be such a baby Draco," Harry said. "Yeah, they're only girls," Ron said. "Have you seen girls when they know what they want?" Draco asked in a kind of girly voice. "Look Draco, all we have to do is act normal," Harry said in a rather reasoning way," although, some of those girls look as though they haven't seen Hogwarts in a few years. If you know what I mean." 


	4. Ginny's Secret Love

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Trade marks belong to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios. **  
  
Chapter 4: Ginny's Secret Love  
  
As Ginny woke with a start she saw Harry, and Ron leaning over her. She suddenly hit Ron with a very powerful force across the face as she screamed bloody murder.  
  
"Ginny what's the matter?" Harry said surprised.  
  
"Nothing, now get the hell out of the girls dormitory!" Ginny snapped back at Harry and Ron as she slid underneath her blankets as to hide from Harry. When Ginny uncovered her head from the blankets she found out that Ron had left but Harry had placed himself on her trunk at the end of her bed.  
  
"Why are you still here? You know this won't look that great if one of the other girls were to wake up!" Ginny exclaimed.  
  
"Yeah, and if you keep screaming then they are going to." Harry said with a sort of sarcasm in his voice.  
  
"Thanks for the update." Ginny once more napped back.  
  
"Ginny, what was your dream about?" Harry said with a lot of caring in his voice.  
  
"Why, do you care, you're Harry Potter, why would you want know about one of my silly little nightmares?" Ginny said.  
  
"Because I know what those types of dreams are like Ginny. And because I think that your dreams might connect a little bit with mine." Harry replied. Ginny looked at Harry with a soft gentle stare.  
  
"Harry maybe you should leave!" Ginny said after a short awkward silence.  
  
"If you wish," Harry said as he got off Ginny's trunk and went through the door and out to the common room.  
  
Ginny then sat in her bed all that night and couldn't sleep. Even though she tried to fall asleep many times through out the night. But all that she could think about was Harry and how much she liked how he had changed through out last year. Harry had changed through out last year in a way many people at Hogwarts had never thought of. Harry had changed from the being sweet and innocent to the punk rocker of Hogwarts and of the wizarding world. The raggedy hair he had in his first four years of Hogwarts was now spiked and highlighted with a platinum blonde. His wardrobe was of all black when not wearing his Gryffindor uniform. He wore metal (all silver as in bracelets, earrings, necklaces, and armbands) when allowed too (he prefers spikes). He even had a tattoo of a Griffin mixed with a Phoenix with the Excalibur and the Godric Gryffindor sword presenting and 'X' underneath the Griffin, Phoenix or otherwise commonly known as the Grifix. To many peoples surprise Harry no longer wore glasses anymore. Many girls paid way more attention to Harry then they usually did. Many wanted to sit next to him at Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner. The only person Harry had liked since his third year at Hogwarts was now paying a lot more attention to him, this year then the his five previous years at Hogwarts. But after all of his effort to get Cho to go out with him he decided that she was a stuck up little bitch and he would much rather be with a kind hearted person like Ginny Weasley (unbeknownst to her).  
  
Ginny then jumped as Hermione burst into the room with a class of water and a book (as usual).  
  
"Ginny, are you okay? Ron told me what happened and I read about this in a book I read over the summer." Hermione said with a leap of joy in her voice  
  
"Hermione, I don't care about some god forsaken book! I just want to sleep like normal people so get the hell out!" Ginny screamed. "GET OUT!"  
  
  
  
  
  
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	5. The Fidelius Charm

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Trade Marks belong to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios. **  
  
Chapter 5: The Fidelius Charm  
  
After one week of girls and throwing themselves at Harry and the gang, they decided to go to Dumbledore for help.  
  
"Harry, this getting way out of hand. I mean girls and guys are both trying to get pictures of all of you." Hermione said in her 'matter of fact' sort of voice. "What do you think we should do?"  
  
"Maybe, we should go to Dumbledore. I mean, yeah he probably hasn't had a date in a couple of centuries. But, hey he is the headmaster." Draco said confidently.  
  
"You, shouldn't be talking, Draco. I haven't seen you with a girl, ever." Harry said with a bit of anger on his voice.  
  
As Harry, Draco, Ron and Hermione opened the portrait hole, there were ten to fifteen Gryffindor girls waiting to surprise them with their cameras. They then dashed for the Headmaster's Office only to be followed by them. They were at a dead sprint but still couldn't loose them no matter how hard that they tried. When they reached the stone gargoyle guarding Dumbledore's office, they realized that they no longer knew the password to get into his office. As luck would have it, the Headmaster was on his way out at that precise moment. It was very lucky, because if he hadn't, who knew what the girls would have done to get their pictures.  
  
"Dumbledore! HELP!" Ron screamed at the Headmaster as he emerged from his office.  
  
"Hurry, get inside!" Dumbledore said as he motioned them inside. "Come on they are gaining on you."  
  
"That was close." Hermione said as they started to go up the stairs not looking back at the door and missing a Ravenclaw slip past the gargoyle and into the entrance.  
  
"Thank goodness girls run slowly." Ron said letting out a sigh.  
  
"Well then what am I?" Hermione said as she punched Ron in the arm.  
  
"Well, if you hit like that, then I don't know?" Ron said holding his arm.  
  
"I'm a girl, you dumbass!" Hermione said as she sat down next to Draco. Ron who had already sat down next to Harry got up and sat on the other side of Hermione with a sharp look at Draco.  
  
"Did we miss something, Potter?" Draco whispered to Harry. "I'm guessing so," Harry said with a smirk on his face. "Why, don't they just make out and get it over with. I mean, How long have they loved each other and neither one can tell. This is sad. They are both the biggest crap weasels I have ever seen." Harry said while he rolled his eyes.  
  
"Dido!" Draco said rather loudly.  
  
"Okay, thank you for waiting." Dumbledore said as he walked into the room. "I will have to do the Fidelius Charm so that you guys are safe from those things outside my door." As Dumbledore said the word 'Fidelius' Harry's mind went back to when he learned that this same charm was suppose to save his parents from Voldemort.  
  
"How do you know that it will work? I mean, who is the right person?" Harry said almost immediately after Dumbledore was done talking.  
  
"Harry I know you have a little trouble trusting me at times, but I assure you this one won't go wrong." Dumbledore said as if there was no other person in the room.  
  
"But who is the person going to be?" Harry said rather stubbornly.  
  
"Hermione will be the secret keeper." Dumbledore said with a glance at Hermione.  
  
"Me!?" Hermione said a little surprised. "Why not you? I mean, are you sure?"  
  
"Yes, Hermione, you." said Dumbledore. "So let's begin."  
  
"This charm will go to the girl in the room; the place is Hogsmeade at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. FIDELIUS! Now take this information and the only known knower is they girl in the room.  
  
Everything went as planned except one mishap. There wasn't just one girl in the room.  
  
  
  
  
  
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	6. So that's What Romeo Meant

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Trade marks belong to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios. New Characters belong to me. **  
  
  
  
Chapter 6: So that's What Romeo Meant  
  
Three days after the charm was set and Harry, Draco, Ron and Hermione had quite a system of how to miss the teaming masses of girls, out for their head shots. Everyday, after classes were over, the four would sneak to W.W.W. under the cover of Harry's invisibility cloak. They would spend the night there, doing their homework, testing new products, or just talking to eachother. Then, every morning, they would wait until their first class (which happened to be Transfiguration) was midway through, they would sneak back to school under the cover of Harry's invisibility cloak.  
  
This day was the same as any other day, except as Harry and the gang made their way to Hogwarts they saw one carriage coming in from Hogsmeade Station. They then waited to see who the carriage was holding, but as the girl stepped out Draco felt his heart leap. She was especially beautiful. She had golden hair that shimmered very brightly in the light and in the dark. Here eyes twinkled like stars in a midnight blue sky. Her figure was that of an hourglass, and her name was Juliette Joli a sixth year at La Maison De Mode Pour Mignon Filles of Paris, France. When they were all inside and eating breakfast Dumbledore stood up and introduced Juliette to the rest of the school as Prof. McGonagall got the Sorting hat and placed it at the front of the school. Juliette was then sorted into Ravenclaw much to the dismay of Draco (and many others it appeared).  
  
Everyone had all of their classes together this year. For not many students had lived through the attack the death-eaters had planned for Hogwarts during Harry's fifth year. All that day Draco was in a daze over Juliette. In every class he made sure that she sat close to him as possible. But, then I potions to Draco's surprise she asked to join them at their cauldron. Draco without hesitation blurts out "Yes!"  
  
"Okay, zank ou so much. Zis Snape guy gives me zeh shivers and so does zis dungeon," Juliette said with a swish of her wand the dungeon had blue and purple draperies entwined within eachother. It was suddenly lit with oil lamps of various coloured flames of, blue, pink, red, orange, green, and purple. The room also smelt of a nature scent.  
  
"What the hell happened in here?" Snape screamed as he entered his class room. "Who is responsible for this hideous mess?"  
  
"It was zis boy ere, sir!" Juliette said pointing at Draco.  
  
"I knew something had to of hit you fairly hard over the head when you became friends with Potter, and his scrawny, useless friends. But, this! This, tops it all off! You have gone insane!" Snape screamed at Malfoy as he tried to walk backward but encountered a wall.  
  
"Sir, I swear it..." Draco started as he looked over at Juliette and saw her eyes in the light produced from the purple flame at their ingredients table and finished, "...it was me sir. Sorry, I thought it would be nice to have a little energy in the room. That's all."  
  
"Yeah, well how is this for energy?" Snape said as he raised his hand as to hit Draco in the face, but snapped his fingers to make everything disappear. "You will all have detention!" Snape finished before starting the lesson.  
  
"Now I know what Romeo meant when he said 'But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.'" Draco whispered to Harry and Ron.  
  
"Oh, bloody hell!" Ron blurted out as Draco finished trying to imitate Romeo.  
  
"Oh, don't even get me started on you and Hermione, Ron!" Draco screamed back as if offended by Ron's sarcasm. At those words Harry couldn't control his laughter that was boiling up inside and burst out laughing. Which of course Snape heard and shouted, "Ten Points from Gryffindor, Potter and if you don't get started on you potion, it will be fifty!!" And at those words Harry could suddenly control his laughter and went back to working on his potion.  
  
Hermione and Ron then looked at eachother with beating red faces. With that they never said one word to eachother or so much as a glance in the other person's direction, and with that they went to bed.  
  
  
  
**** Thank you everyone who read and reviewed my story! It means a lot! Thank You! R/R! **** 


	7. Detention or MORE!

**DISCLAIMER: Harry Potter and Trade Marks belong to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers Studios. New Characters belong to ME!! **  
Chapter 7: DETENTION OR MORE?!  
Harry, Ron, Draco and Hermione made their way from Hogsmeade to Hogwarts to find out with who and where they would attend their detentions. As they made their way to Professor Snape's office, they saw that the door was open and peeked inside. To everyone's surprise when they walked in, it wasn't Snape that they saw at all, but a certain French exchange student by the name of Julliette. (Who had gotten them into this mess into the first place.) She seemed to be snooping around his office trying to find a trap door or a hidden camera in the wall.   
"What are you doing here? I'm pretty sure that he didn't give you a detention. I mean since you didn't do anything wrong." Ron said with a look that could kill.   
"I waz juz looking for zeh professor. I wanted to tell him..." Juliette started but was cut off by none other then Snape himself.   
"Tell me what?" Snape said rather harsh, but he didn't give a damn.   
"Oh, nozing much. Just ow much I like your class and ow well I am getting along wiz all of zeh ozer studentz. " Juliette said as she started to walk past Draco then stopped, grabbed Draco's ass and told him to meet her in the great hall after detention.  
"Dude! I think she digs me!" Draco said excitedly.   
"Yeah! And how do you wonder that?!" Harry said in a disgusting sort of tone.   
"She grabbed my ass then told me to meet her in the great hall after detention was over!" Draco said trying to keep this on a 'down low' but not having it work that well for him.   
"Wow, amazing Draco a girl that actually wants you. Who'd believe it!?" Ron said trying hard not to look at Hermione.   
"Yeah! And I don't see you actually making lip contact with anyone in the near future!" Draco said trying to make it sound like him and Ron were just having a normal friendly conversation.   
"Yeah, well I don't see you doing anything 'else' in the near future either!" Hermione said as she kicked him right where it hurts. "Oops, were you going to use that tonight?" Hermione finished as she watched Draco curl into a ball in the middle of the floor. Ron and Harry then went to Draco to try and help him up off the floor.   
"Hermione! Do you know how much that hurts?" Harry said with the mixture of rather surprise, amusement (at Draco's expense) and Fright (for his own well being) evident in his voice.   
"No. But I can guess." Hermione said before they all looked at the door where a young Ravenclaw girl was standing with her camera wildly clicking away at the scene that lay before her. They stood there transfixed at what was happening, to all of their surprise, they watched Hermione attack the girl and mutilate her camera into little scraps (with her bare hands, mind you). As she walked back in she fixed her skirt and stood next to Ron, who then moved quickly to the side. "Well I don't think that we should go to detention today. I'm not in the mood." Hermione said while talking gasps of breathe after every word.   
"Whatever you say. I really don't feel like crying today." Harry said as they all walked out of Snape's office and quickly ran to WWW, before anyone could spot them.   
"Okay, I'm going to bed before I get cranky!" Hermione said as she went down stairs to the basement where they all slept.  
"Before she gets cranky? I think that it's a little to late." Harry said to Draco and Ron when they heard the basement door slam shut behind her.  
"Wait, How did that girl know that we would be there at school that night? I mean Hermione is supposed to be the persons that know where we are. You don't think that she could of told, do you?" Ron said with a worried sound on his voice.   
"What the hell is all this noise? Other people live here as well as you vermin." Fred said as he descended the stairs with George at his heels.  
"Err... We think that Hermione spilled the beans about where we were." Ron said to Fred and George in a loud whisper.  
"She what?!" George screamed.  
"We don't know for sure. So keep your voice down. Should we ask her?" Harry said to Fred and George, as they stood there paralyzed.   
"Just ask her and she will tell you the truth. I think." Fred said almost falling asleep on George's shoulder.  
"Okay, we will ask her in the morning." Draco said a little drowsy.  
"No, we have to ask her tonight otherwise we might not be alive in the morning. I mean if they really do know where we are, then who knows what will happen." Harry said in a hushed voice.  
"But... Harry... We might not even make it with Hermione in the mood that she is in." Ron said with a little whimper.  
"Okay, then fine. HERMIONE!!" Harry called down the stairs.  
"What the hell do you want!?" Hermione snapped back.  
"We need to talk to you!" Ron shouted down stairs from behind Harry.  
"Fine then but you come down here, I'm warm!" Hermione said a little nicer this time.   
"Okay, whatever." Harry muttered to himself. They then walked back down the stairs then through the door to see Hermione looking very content where she was. "Okay, Hermione we need to know something." Hermione then looked at Harry with the 'okay what the hell do you want to ask me?' look on her face. "Okay, well we wanted to ask you if you ever told anyone where we were?"  
"What the hell are you saying?" Hermione said rather rude.  
"We aren't saying anything, we are only asking." Ron said getting up from his seat as to get a better head start for the door if she starts to get any madder then she was at that moment.   
"Well, if you want to know... NO! I didn't. I mean I know that I haven't been in a very good mood today but I wouldn't tell. You guys are my best friends and I wouldn't want anything to happen to you guys." Hermione said rather sincere.   
"Just out of curiosity, why do you ask though?" she asked after a minute of silence.  
"Oh, we just realized that the only way that that Ravenclaw would have known we where at the school, would have been for her to know what the Secret Keeper knows," Harry said almost immediately.  
"I guess that this is just something else that we'll have to figure out along with everything else." 


End file.
